Gain Power through Pleasure and Passion – 5 Ways to Boost Your Confidence Without Beating Yourself Up

My birthday is my new year.  This is when I set my goals, and decide what kind year I want to have going forward.  Generally I create a theme based upon what I want, more specifically how I want to feel. Personal Power

This year, I want to explode!  Specifically, I want more pleasure, passion, and power.  Not power as in “world domination.”  Power as in the ability to see it, believe it, and achieve it within one year, no excuses or exceptions!  

As I woman I know I am most open, most receptive in life when we are in the thoroughs of pleasure and passion. When I am giving someone, or some-thing, my all.  When I am simply a wide open channel, totally surrendering to the moment. That happens when we are 100% confident in ourselves – not just our skills and ability, but our look, our walk, our talk, our femininity, our ability to deliver.  If you feel confident about yours skills, but not your shoes, you do not deliver with as much power or passion at the podium, so to speak — too busy making sure the your shoes are hidden.  That’s not to say you don’t do well.  But regardless of the results when we don’t feel good, feel confident, the results ultimately don’t matter.  

How many women (and men) got it going on and no matter how much you say it, they do not feel it, believe it, live it.  Low self-esteem and a lack of confidence are the building blocks of poor relationships and abuse, both giving and receiving, to self and others.

Think about a time when you felt the most free, not worried about anything.  It was likely at some point when you were having a good time.  When your face was turned to the sun, you were laughing, dancing, playing, giggling, perhaps even climaxing (had to throw that in there it counts!).  No one is thinking about their “shoes,” i.e. their education, career path, weight, or makeup, in the midst of unbridled joy, ecstasy, or pleasure.  You are open, receptive, all in for all the moment has to offer.   Continue Reading

Waiting for Thor: Five Ways You Might Have Unrealistic Expectations of Men You Date

Ok,Thor I wanted to call this Waiting for Superman until I realized it was a documentary on the education system in DC – great piece BTW. Then I realized that Thor and his “enchanted hammer” might be a far better example for 2014. And at the very least Chris Hemsworth – cast as Thor – is dreamy!

I am enamored with superheros! I always have been. I must have been one in a former life, I am sure of it! I mean what’s not to love, they have perfect bodies, amazing powers, deep sensitive personalities, even the brooding bad boy or nerdy types are hot. Some are rich, many are handsome, and a few are down-right sexy! What’s not to love?

But superheros aren’t reality. And, I don’t live in the Marvel or DC Universe (fictional worlds that birthed these yummy men). Neither Superman, nor Thor is waiting around to take me away from all of “this”. And truthfully I don’t want to be taken away. What I really want is my version of Thor, to come into my life (with his “enchanted hammer” of course) and we create a very real, and deeply satisfying relationship.

But I’ve noticed lately, that’s not what’s being promoted out there in the real world. We got The Millionaire Matchmaker, The Bachelorette, Bachelor Doctor segment on Dr. Oz, not to mention all of the romantic comedies and love stories featuring Morris Chestnut, and Ryan Gosling. All these men are “perfect”. Well their resumes are any way. The have great jobs, great bodies, handsome faces, lots of money, a mansion, fast cars, they know how to dress, they are sensitive, caring, and want a commitment to only one woman.

Yet, when leading groups and seminars for women, that just doesn’t seem to be the reality. Women (and men for that matter) are frustrated, lonely, sad, and disappointed. They’ve somehow chosen to “renovate” Mr. Potential, or they are waiting for one of these impeccable resume guys to come along. Neither of which ever works out for anyone.

I’m not saying Thor Continue Reading

All The Single Mommies . . . 5 Simple Ways to Bring Your Sexy Back!

As a single-mom, we often get so caught up in playing mommy (and for some of us daddy too) that we don’t take time to see ourselves as anything other than a mom. We are very in touch with the nurturing, maternal side of our femininity, but not the womanly, sensual, sexy side of our femininity. Part of being an empowered woman, an irresistible woman, is taking the time to acknowledge your femininity outside of motherhood.

Sexy Silhoettes

It’s hard for us to be the provider, the cook, the maid, the secretary, the chauffer, the soccer-mom, and the mommy who kisses boo-boos all in one day; for some of us all in one hour! It can get crazy sometimes – Ask me how I know this?!  And then, turn around and be the vixen, the goddess, the fem-fatal, who looks like Venus, and seduces men with just one glance.  And in all honesty, who are we kidding, most women are just too tired to even thing about any of that.  Even women I know who are married, say their favorite activity is sleep when they do not have their children — and by sleep they do not mean “sex with their husbands.”  They mean sleep for hours at a time no interruption and no one to tell them when they have to wake up.

The first thing is as acknowledge that you want it and on some level we actually need it. Dr. Phil once stated that children are meant to leave us.  We are responsible for their total care when they are first born and then they gradually begin to care for themselves as they grow older.  If we’ve done our jobs well, this is a seamless transition for the child and for ourselves.  We’ve given enough attention to their care and development and harmonized with our own as they grow older.

There are some women who have no identity, no sense of femininity, Continue Reading